RPG – PTA The Other Side quotes

From the last three episodes..

Steve’s troll is named The Other One. Trolls are stupid, we have fun when we all get to play trolls. Tony the mobster troll crashes The Other One’s family dinner.
Tony: what’s your name?
The Other One (asking for help): Mother?
Tony: You’re not my mother?
Other One: Aren’t I?
Tony: No!
Other One: Are you my mother?
Tony: I don’t know.

later in the scene, the mobster trolls are trying to work out what to do with the Other One….Tony: If I wasn’t so confused I would suggest he has to be tested. But I’m still not sure if I’m his mother.

The King: You can’t reverse psychology me!

Enrico, dashing elder brother to Alfredo: I guess what you’ve just said has made me realise that I’ve never felt a true emotion.

Gerald, secretary at the Embassy where Sam interns: Sam. You’re a girl. Weird.
Sam: I told you it was complicated.
Gerald: Yeah but I figured you were just being a teenager.
Sam (rolling eyes sarcasm): This *is* completely normal teenage behaviour.
Gerald: That is!…You’re a freak.
Sam: Dick.

Addie, tree sprite trying to fit in at the call centre, relating office stories to Embassy staff in order to get a Visa to go to Earth: I distributed dirt under my workmate’s desk and planted him in it but it didn’t go down well.
Sam: You see? Two cultures colliding is confusing!
Addie to Sam, emo kid: You look like a very nice raccoon.
Sam: thanks?

Not sure who said this, but it’s important: The siege on the Earth Embassy has been called off for a nuptial dinner with the Fifis.

(Plot: Alfredo’s mother in law laid siege to the Earth embassy because the ab king pro she bought on Earth hasn’t made her husband thin. Isaac [Svend’s cynical ambassadorial lackey] wasn’t very helpful. Alfredo managed to smooth things out by being engaged to the terrifying Fifi heiress.)

Sam is called to the Principal’s office because s/he has been selling pre-approved Earth Visa applications at school. The Principal is a centaur, who leans forward to intimidate Sam. There is a thunderclap, Sam switches from girl to boy. The centaur raises one eyebrow. Nothing is said.

Next Ep: Isaac has been kidnapped by men working for The Grand Vizier, who works for Alfredo’s father. The Vizier lives in a constant state of pissed off.

The Other One is trying not to be a bad troll: Uhm, Mr Villain? I think you’re talking about stealing. (Implied subtext: which is wrong)
Mob boss: stealing is such a nasty word. I prefer something like bank robbery.

Sam’s family dinner turns into an argument. Sam: I could move back to Earth, I could move in with the Jones’, I mean, they’re good people, you know them.
Sam’s Dad: She’s a drunk.
Sam: Well, no more than you.

Sophie, office assistant at the call centre Addie works at, speaking to an interested orc: It’s called Buddhism. I can teach you if you like, it’s easy.

Delores (call centre manager): Uh, I hate to be a busy body-
Alfredo: then don’t be.

Next episode, all the main characters have been invited to the Nuptials dinner for Alfredo and the Fifi heiress.
Sam’s Dad: We want to learn everything we can, we don’t want to embarrass Earth.
Isaac: That’ll be a change.
Sam’s Dad: What, has Sam done something?
Sam: Oh, nice assumption.

Luigi, dumbest mob troll evah: The boss said to me……I forgot.

Alfredo offers The Black Knight a job on his personal bodyguard.
The Black Knight: That’s a pretty good offer but…..I’m in telecommunications now.
Alfredo: Fear? You are The Black Knight, fear is unknown to you!
Black Knight: That was before I worked in customer service.

Scary talking plant in Isaac’s house: smoking is bad for you. Second hand smoke is bad for *me*. I am now going to chew on your shoes.

Addie has organised a group of Elvis impersonators (because Elvis is Earth’s king), who are to perform at the Nuptials dinner.
Delores: You’re showing a bit much up front, dear, Elvis didn’t show so much cleavage.
Generic Orc girl: well, Elvis wasn’t trying to land a royal husband!

My name is Ms Generic, they told me to get a generic Earth name, y’see.

Addie: You tried to mug my friend.
The Other One: No, that troll had two ears. I only have one.

Isaac questions Sam about not being at his/her desk when the bomb at the Embassy went off, Sam was stealing stuff for the black market Visas at the time….Sam: it’s alright. I had to go to the room with the stuff in it….it was for school! But it’s ok. I’m not doing that project any more.

PoF: Mogwai
CO: procrastination is fun

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